


Graduation

by emmykay



Category: Ookiku Furikabutte | Big Windup!
Genre: Future Fic, M/M, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-01
Updated: 2014-09-01
Packaged: 2018-02-15 16:06:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2235126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emmykay/pseuds/emmykay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Abe and Mihashi accidentally meet up at the ballfield the night before their high school graduation ceremony.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Graduation

**Author's Note:**

> Thinking a little bit about lots of touching.

Abe walks through the gate of the chain link fence, staring up at the waxing gibbous moon. It was late, but when he had left the house, he figured that his mom wouldn't mind. He, and everybody else in his year, would be graduating tomorrow. 

It was an impulse, coming down here, wearing only his school clothes. He left his coat at home. It's unusually mild for the middle of March, a sudden warming trend that surprised all the weather forecasters. 

He leans up against the post in the dugout, staring out at the field. Almost like spring was here already. The air feels on the verge of green, the weeds on the field sending out pale little shoots. The memories here…from the first time he had visited this field, to all the practices, to the games, the strategy sessions and the tournaments. 

He sighs and stares up again at the moon. What was that from classical lit class?

_Mii Temple_  
 _knocking on the gate for a wish_  
 _today's moon_

The furrow between his eyebrows deepened. What had his teacher said? Something about the poet wanting to linger because of the good time he was having. Abe smiles to himself. That was certainly true. And while this felt like spring, there was something in the air about the ending of things as well. Kind of autumnal.

Ah, well. He isn't a poet and not really given to flights of fancy. Not beyond baseball, anyway. It's been a good run. Not as good as he wanted, but probably better than he deserved. His high school baseball career was a sweaty montage of hard work, pain, heartache, victory, and had more than its share of luck. One of the first things being Mihashi. His pitcher was definitely among the strokes of luck that had happened to him.

The bang and clash of the latch against the aluminum post causes Abe to spin around. _Shit_. He doesn't want to be embarrassed by his nostalgia, but he can't help it. 

Of course. It's Mihashi. As if summoned by his thoughts.

Mihashi bobs his head, surprised, nervous. 

Now that Abe knows who it is, his heart accelerates, instead of slowing down. Falsely cheerful, he calls out, "Hey! How're you?" He winces. He can hear how crap he is at faking cheer.

Mihashi squints and then looks around.

"It's just me," Abe says, sticking his hands into his pockets. "You looking to see who else might be hiding out here in the dark on a student-groomed baseball field in early March, the night before graduation?" 

The soft curves of Mihashi's mouth turn upwards. He approaches Abe and steps down into the dugout. While the ability to take one of Abe's sarcastic comments in good humor is relatively new, the smile is the same. He's filled out some since they first met, but not a lot. Unlike Abe, who is on the road to becoming as broad-shouldered as his father. They've both come a long way, physically and with their ability to communicate. 

_I'm going to miss that smile._ It's a fleeting thought, occurring often in the past few months, and Abe dismisses it quickly.

"'m good," Mihashi says. "You?"

Abe shrugs a single shoulder. "Okay. It was nice they excused us early. Shun was ticked because the underclassmen had to stay to clean and decorate the assembly room."

"The decorations will be nice." 

Abe notices how Mihashi's eyes cut toward him and then away. Abe has spent years of his life watching Mihashi. While he might not understand everything, he doesn't miss a single motion. "Yeah. Tomorrow." He waits. Shortly, he is rewarded.

"I'll be missing," Mihashi's voice falters. "Everyone." 

"That why you're here?"

Mihashi nods. "Thinking. Remembering." He looks up at the sky.

"Me too." Abe is glad that his voice doesn't waver too much. He pulls his hands out of his pockets, wraps one around the post of the dugout. "Coming to Nishiura was a good decision." He pauses, wondering if he sounded as jerky to Mihashi as he sounded to himself. "I mean - for me. I'm glad we - " he clears his throat. The need to say something, the right thing, propels the words out of his mouth. "Thank you, Mihashi, for these past three years. I'm sorry I didn't say before, but you're going to do great in the minors." He stops, breathes, feeling something burning the back of his throat. 

They look at each other. Abe wonders, of all the time he's spent studying Mihashi, has Mihashi been looking at him? What has Mihashi been seeing that whole time?

Mihashi gapes. "No, Abe. Thank you. You're amazing. Without you, I - we - Nishiura - never have done as well as we've done. You made me the ace - "

Abe shakes his head, starting to feel the heat of embarrassment rise up his neck. "Any catcher could do it."

"Not any catcher."

"Any _good_ catcher," Abe says. "The league is full of good catchers."

Mihashi keeps talking. "I'm sorry you won't - " 

"It's okay. Don't worry about me." Abe grins without meaning it. "Shizuoka University has a baseball club."

"Probably a lot of good pitchers there." 

"Not better than you," Abe says, trying to reassure. "No one's better than you. You're going to be in the majors before too long. You're the best!" 

"Yeah." Mihashi bobs his head, forlornly.

After three years of reassurance, with the minor leagues waiting on the other side of next week, there doesn't seem much more Abe can say. He wants to grab Mihashi and - and - "Well, I should go," Abe says, feeling like he said too much already, like he might say even more. 

"There won't be anybody who will take care of me." Mihashi's forehead is wrinkled with worry. 

So that's what it was. "Moron," Abe says, with such fondness he's suddenly afraid Mihashi will read the truth. "That's all they do there."

"Not watching my weight or making sure I eat or sleep. Not like - not like - "

There is such a pang deep in Abe's chest, he fights for a breath. "Someone will take care of you, will always want to take care of you. If they don't watch out for you, so help me, I'll - I'll - " Abe wrestles with the desire to noogie the hell out of the entire management team of the Seibu Lions. He exhales, fiery, hands on hips. "You tell me and I'll yell at them. Make them sorry."

"Okay." Mihashi looks up and holds out his hand, only half-extending. 

Reflexively, Abe reaches forward and takes it in his own. They haven't done this in months, not since their last game together, but the action is so ingrained that he doesn't think of anything but 'take it.' Thoughtfully, Abe rubs his thumb over Mihashi's. Mihashi's hand is bigger than he remembered from the first time they did this, almost three years ago, but the tough calluses across the fingers are the same. 

"Abe," Mihashi says, softly. Abe isn't certain, but he thinks he sees the glimmer of damp in Mihashi's eyes. Mihashi ducks his head. He clenches his hand into a fist over Abe's fingers.

"Mihashi!" Abe says loudly, and winces just a bit. Partly to try to be funny and break the sudden tension, and partly because Mihashi's grip is strong as hell and it fucking hurts.

Immediately, the pressure on Abe's hand is released. But instead of letting go completely, Mihashi brings Abe's hand to one side of his face and holds it, slowly circling his cheek. "S-sorry."

Abe's heart is thumping. Something is different here. He is, or was, attuned to every one of Mihashi's words and movements - from full sentence to each stuttered utterance and all the way to silence; from the way he stood to the way he ran. But high school baseball is over. The grieving was, is still, painful. He loves it still, but he's been dreading the impending changes.

"I haven't seen you," Mihashi says.

"Sorry." It's true. He had been trying to pay less attention in the past couple of months. He hadn't seen Mihashi outside of quick glances in school for a while. Not since their loss at Koshien. Not since the scouts started visiting. Maybe that's why he having trouble putting a finger on what is happening. "No," Abe replies, suddenly grasping for words. "It's been busy - for you and me, I think."

Mihashi brings Abe's hand down the side of his own neck. The skin there is incredibly soft. Abe wants to close his eyes and drown in this forbidden sensation. His eyes stay open, focusing on the sight of his hand on the paler curves of Mihashi's throat, the tips of his fingers dipping under Mihashi's Adam's apple, slipping across the notch at the top of his sternum.

Tipping his head up, Mihashi says, "I - I - " Abe finds himself looking into tawny irises reflecting the silver moonlight. "Missed you."

"Yes." Abe didn't mean to sound so emphatic. He'd been hiding it for who knows how long, and for all that time, it had been safe, it had been the right thing to do. He did it to protect their partnership, to protect Mihashi. Whatever he was, whatever he did in the future, he would be fine, he knew that - but Mihashi, funny, scrawny, sensitive little Mihashi had to be safeguarded for as long as possible. Even if it was from himself. "And I'll miss you, too, after graduation." He meant to sound factual, bored, scornful, anything but what it ends up sounding like. His voice comes out unintentionally gruff, and for all Abe is used to hiding, it is hard to hide using words that mean what he feels. He wants to pull away. _Mihashi can't know._

Mihashi brings Abe's hand to his own mouth, and gently, slowly, drags the backs of Abe's fingers across the delicate skin of his lips. Mihashi's breaths are quick, warm puffs against the sensitive skin. "Please." Mihashi opens his mouth, just a little, and Abe's forefinger rests against the wet softness that's just past where Mihashi's lips meet. 

Abe's eyes slowly close. Opening them, he asks, "Are you sure?" 

Mihashi shifts Abe's hand back to his cheek, as if he can't bear to let go. "I didn't know how to say. For a long time. But not saying hurts more. I realized that this winter."

Something inside Abe breaks open, and the rawness of that wound is incredibly painful and incredibly relieving. Abe might have been wanting to protect Mihashi, but he was also protecting himself. Now, Mihashi has come to him. Finally. He wants to cry and shout hallelujahs.

Still, he can't help asking, again, "You really sure? You have your whole career ahead of you. You can find anybody -"

Mihashi turns his head and his mouth closes, and gently, so gently, Abe feels Mihashi's teeth bite down. There's no pain, only a pressure that lets up quickly. Now, there is now only the wet and yielding softness inside Mihashi's mouth. 

Self-conscious, Abe pulls his hand back. "Let's - let's not do this here."

Mihashi's lower lip quivers.

Hastily, Abe says, "Let's go back to my house." He wants to laugh at Mihashi's sudden expression change from hopeless to hopeful. Mihashi nods, quickly, jerkily. Then he blushes. Under Mihashi's lashes, Abe can see a smile. He reaches out and Mihashi takes his hand.

In the morning, if nothing has changed, or if everything has changed, Abe will have had tonight. That is more than he could have ever thought possible. He will have to remember that, treasure it, however it ends between them. 

It suddenly feels like spring.

**Author's Note:**

> The haiku was written by Basho. One of the things that haiku do is refer to other work at other times, such as the haiku here. The Mii-Temple is also the name of a Noh play that is about the reunion of a mother and child, as well as the feeling of the poet referred to in this story. [ reference ](http://darumamuseumgallery.blogspot.com/2007/06/mii-temple.html)
> 
> I've thought about what names Mihashi and Abe would call each other at this point in their relationship. Mihashi is written as very polite in addressing other people, Abe as not, but both of them have some issues with first-name basis, and combined with my difficulty in using honorifics and appropriate versions of 'you' in English, I decided they would use their last names only.
> 
> "Using no honorific at all (called yobisute) is also an honorific — it's a "null honorific", and it means the speaker is addressing the person to whom he is speaking in an intimate and familiar manner usually restricted to family, spouses or one's closest friends. Usually, this is only done when First Name Basis permission is granted by the subject. Using no honorific without such permission is a grave insult; this is a subtlety lost on many foreign visitors, who offend people with no idea that they're doing so (although nowadays this is generally not the case for most foreigners since most Japanese understand that most foreigners do not use honorifics). Addressing someone in yobisute for the first time frequently marks an important point in a Romance Arc or friendship. " - from tv.tropes.org [ link ](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/UsefulNotes/JapaneseHonorifics?from=Main.JapaneseHonorifics)


End file.
